im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
