Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
