Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
