I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize