I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
i need some magic done to my vagina
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Randomize
