I want to stick my p in your. b.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
