would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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