I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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