Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
