I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize