How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
