I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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