True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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