Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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