guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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