yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
