I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
they need to just BURY HIM!
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
