Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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