I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
