Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
