i permit you to call me
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Drake has all the answers
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
