on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
they need to just BURY HIM!
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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