Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
