Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
