what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
