she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
