it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
