Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
