There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize