Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
