Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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