I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
