I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
