Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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