how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize