was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
