Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
