Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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