i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
A bitchslap is in order.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
