Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize
