She's JV to your varsity
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
