I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
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