I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
did i walk over a car last night?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
We don't watch enough power rangers
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
