think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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