Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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