I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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