Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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