he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
