Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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