...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
