Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
